Monday, November 06, 2006
@12:55 AM
its been a long time since i last update. well cos reali busy lately. got course la some nite life wit close frenz and stuff. but ytd night reali made me wake up my idea. well i shall not reveal some names here. durin a day a fren name L did something which alot of people think is stupid. but to be honest i think he isnt. alothough wat gx said abt the 5 year thing is true i stil believe u should go all the way L! lookin at L's situation i cant help but to reflect on my. as gx explain to mi wat does the reply from the gal to L means i start to think. and i had thought hard. but still alot of things are botherin me countless. its painful to be lost and stuck in e middle of no where.. i reali jus wanna rest awhile take a breather and enjoy my everyday life. is that too much to ask for? i seem to be losin my interest and happiness in doin my stuffs. im startin to hav doubts startin to worry startin to draft away in gear 5. i feel that i had lost my identity and i dunno who am i or rather what am i good at. i jus cant be myself i jus cant say or do wat i reali wanna say or do. one of my worst pain is to act like noth happened and smile and laugh when im bleedin inside. but thats exactly wat im doin now..im smilin and happy but inside of me i reali feelin like blastin out everything! i know my life is like a bus where people come and go jus like that but at times i reali needa jus stop my bus and reali get to make people stay alittle longer. i dun mind u alightin but i jus hope that i got a sense of feelin that i stil hav people who is willin to stay and alight one stop later. i know im goin crazy and im very vexed and the worst part is i dun even know wat is able to help me. and this is my life i have the rite to choose wat i wanna do why is it that i had to do things to suit other people's likin? why cant i do wat i wan? i feel that im goin to overload soon.. dunno where is that hole at the bottom gone to, somehow it went missin a long time ago and im bottlin things more than ever. everythin is inside of me now. no where but inside of me..............
Another enjoyin day, thx =)
break_evo@hotmail.com